公主般的幸福

after being a happy little girl last night, i was a super duper happy princess this morning ^^

to stop myself from thinking the unneeded, i force myself to slp earlier last night.. KO at about 2am.. ya i know not very early but i tried! said a little thanksgiving prayer to daddy JC and still keeping my miracle request in my prayer. i was already very grateful for whatever that's going on last nite. and guess wat.. God doesnt stop blessing me! :) got his call at 5.30am and i jumped out of my bed. he just finish his appt and am at ECP. so he called to ask if i wanted bfast.. awwww so sweet! to tink of it, when was the last time someone actually ask me if i wan bfast and reali got them for me? deliver right to my place somemore :)

initially he said he just pass me the food and wil head home. but me decided to be a little naughty and say i want to spend some time with him. and yes! we spent sometime in his car and chatted, showing him vids of our co's awards night, laughing at some funny stuffs. it was a nice short meet up. and another thing i ask for - a hug :) and i got it! ^^ felt reali good being able to hug him again :) each time we hug, i just feel very comfortable. it's like.. i can put the rest of the world aside for awhile and just indulge in his presence.. he gave me a peck on my cheek and i teared. hmm.. just feel a little sad and happy at the same time.

highlight of my morning meet up with him. he gave a peck on my forehead.. my heart melted 101%.. being kissed is so common between couples.. but being kissed on your forehead.. priceless. i dunno if he means it that way. but all girls love forehead kisses. cos it simply means "I love you, and i wan to take care of you." It's the kiss that lets you know he's got your back. The kiss that separates the "I love you" from the "I'm in love with you."

I remember reading this somewhere in a article on different types of kisses "The forehead kiss is usually whipped out when the guy feels as comfortable around you as you feel and he wants you to know how much he cares about you without words." i certainly do wish that this is what he truly meant when he kissed my forehead. it felt.. magically wonderful :) and for that short moment, i was turned into a princess. a princess who felt total happiness. totally love. it feels reali good to be in his arms. just leaning on his shoulder, cuddling, kissing, looking at one another.

after which, gotta go home and prepare for work :( while otw home, i felt i'm crazily in love. this is consider one of the rare times when i dun get pissed AT ALL for being woken at 5.30am with 3hrs of slp. in fact, i felt recharged :) my day totally brightened up. even gina was asking me "why ur mood today so good ar?" tsktsk. it seems i'm more productive at work and my attitude is 101% good when my day started right :)

oh! and he got me my fave zui kueh! xD soooooooooo happy! he remembered that i mentioned before that i like the zui kueh from that particular stall :D but thn there's another pack of bee hoon which he initially bought lol~ and and! more surprise! my fave.. SKITTLES! *love love* all these overwhelming happiness reali made me feel that i was swept off my feet and fall all crazily in love again. how wonderful would it be if we're still dating.. i would be such a ultimately blessed girl to have him solely to myself. reality sucks uh? sigh~

and tomorrow he'd be leaving for HK :( 5 dayssssss..... ahhhhhh~ gonna feel so alone and down again :( the fear of losing him is back :( afterall, i always lose him aft a trip.. phobia alr :( and.. was on the phone with him and he mentioned about her again.. i thought.. she can finally be out of the picture. but.. hais.. and she's asking him to travel.. i have a thought now. if it comes true. i tink.. i might.. i would.. hmm~ lets see.

my heart cannot take anymore such roller coaster rides..
i turned back and accepted him cos i know i stil love him and didnt want to give up..
i turned back because i wanted to give us both a chance.
i turned back because i know he is what i want..
but i reali cannot accept complications anymore..
i dun wanna go back to those days constantly having to wry that i'd be abandon any time.
i dun wanna go back fighting with someone else over a love one..
i dun wanna go back having to share..
i wanna be selfish.. for once.. he taught me to voice out wat i wan.. he taught me to be demanding..
and yes.. i tink i should be selfish now..
if i want him, i want him solely to myself.
no more sharing.