had a i-am-so-lost day today :( only went to one unit for viewing and wakao~ it's a F big disappoinment X( after that was just a rotitng day at home.. i mean in room :( steph ask me out to dbl O.. if i were the old iko i'd just say yes and let's party on.. but i just was overloaded with too many things now i guess.. even if i go i also wont be enjoying myself.. besides, goin back there will just remind me of him.. sigh~ rahh rahh~ i should stop talking bout him.. anyway instead of goin out, steph's coming over to my place lol~ we're so gonna have a good drink and nice chat at home :) she also had alot of worries now so i guess we'll be each other's listening ear tonite ba.. infact i think she's a reali strong girl.. so much thing happened to her yet she's stil moving no so strongly.. her life was reali ruined by GUYS~ damn it.. i wont say wat happen here but i seriously curse him to the max.. ruin her stil dun wan leave her.. tmd~ reali is a cbk.. she's such a nice girl lor.. so nice and so loving.. dunno why he doesnt noe how to cherish her.. this kinda guy ought to be shot in the head la.. dig out their heart and flush down the toilet bowl.. nabeis~ X( anyway hope the law will protect her ba.. and we all will protect her :) jiayou girl! you're not alone :) bahh~ i'm so bored now.. tink i'll just rot infront of my tv while waiting for her to arrive ba.. gd nite~

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我的心好痛。。
我好想你 =........(



梁靜茹-會呼吸的痛

在東京鐵塔　第一次眺望　看燈火模仿　墜落的星光
我終於到達　但卻更悲傷　一個人完成　我們的夢想

and just when i'm enjoying being a lil happy girl.. you took it all away.. you left me all alone here all by myself.. it hurts.. so much.. baby.. thanks for the memories we've shared.. i loved you so.. this love was just so strong for me to let go.. you have to.. it's all u said.. it's ok baby.. i understand.. i wont force anything and i'll be a strong girl.. a strong girl who move on in life happily.. wish you all the best baby..


David Cook - Always be my baby..

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine

Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
No!

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back, babe
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my my baby....

You'll always be a part of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on....)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

Always be my baby

goodbye and goodluck..

had our girls nite out with xuemin and yuyun last nite to hilltop and had reali good chats.. hmm this 2 days had made me realised how lucky i am to have baby in my life.. hmm firstly was xuemin told me bout her r/s with ahjin.. it wasnt reali good.. but i guess there's stil hope for them if she manage to get him to sit down and talk properly.. after that was yuyun told me her problems.. it was just some kind of i like him but he dun like me kinda thing la.. hmm i can understand that kinda feeling for sure.. i've been thru it umpteen times lol~~ thn after that was yifeng telling me some of his prob.. hmm nothing much i can help or advice also since i'm not that close with him.. we just had a lil chat this noon onli.. after all these.. i just felt i'm already consider a lucky girl le ba.. for having such a sweet baby, so understandin.. many told us they envy the both of us.. the 3 of them especially keep mentioning it.. but afterall.. we too envy others ar.. they can openly shout out I LOVE YOU! we couldnt.. they could plan for their future we couldnt.. we cant even imagine our future lol~ so.. i guess there'll always be good and bad in all r/s ba.. that's why i say fate sucks.. BOO!! but afterall i'm stil thankful for a loving baby and wish that nothing will ever change..

i'm willing to give up a woman's biggest dream for you baby..
it's just cos i love you so much <3

so much had happened recently and i'm extremely thankful that everything's peace now.. lotsa misunderstanding and accidents here and there and i'm thankful that both me and baby could have the best talk last nite.. it's been long since i can truly smile :) nothing much to mention here.. just know that i'm the happiest girl on earth now :D a very special song for my very special boy..


David Cook - Always be my baby..

We were as one babe
For a moment in time
And it seemed everlasting
That you would always be mine

Now you want to be free
So I'm letting you fly
Cause I know in my heart babe
Our love will never die
No!

You'll always be a part of me
I'm a part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I ain't gonna cry no
And I won't beg you to stay
If you're determined to leave girl
I will not stand in your way
But inevitably you'll be back again
Cause ya know in your heart babe
Our love will never end no

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

I know that you'll be back girl
When your days and your nights get a little bit colder oooohhh
I know that, you'll be right back, babe
Ooooh! baby believe me it's only a matter of time

You'll always be a part of me
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my my baby....

You'll always be a part of me (you will always be)
I'm part of you indefinitely
Girl don't you know you can't escape me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby
And we'll linger on (we will linger on....)
Time can't erase a feeling this strong
No way you're never gonna shake me
Ooh darling cause you'll always be my baby

Always be my baby


just like you said baby..
our love wasnt affected at all..
iloveyou <3

i had a terrible day.. all thanks to my stupid mouth again.. why do i always have to piss the one i love off when everything could be avoided? =\ sigh~ just went to jetty alone to have some reflection and catch some fresh air.. felt kinda lonely but i guess lonely helps us think better ya? i thot of alot of things.. especially between us.. i still couldnt believe i could hurt him so much.. i reali am so lost now :( there's like so much things i wanna say to him.. but i just dunno where to start.. the thot of him might stop loving me one day reali makes me so scared.. i just.. am so scared :( i wish i didnt drink that nite.. i wish i didnt say those stuffs that nite.. i wish.. i reali wish.. could i ever have a chance to be his good girl again? i didnt receive his imu and ilu at all today :( how could our love be so fragile? sigh~ i tink i deserve to be shot in the head big time.. i'm beginning to hate being me.. i'm such a idiot.. hais

i yearn for your hug..
i yearn for your smile..
i yearn to be in your arms..
i yearn..
for our laughter :(
baby i miss you so much :(

i cant believe i love you just soooooooooooo much!!

it's been hard for me to accept a few facts and wild imagination i've been having recently =\ but of cos i'm a strong girl and will be stronger thn ever :) and whenever i'm having and unhappiness regarding my simplicated r/s, i'll always turn my eyes to this very special blog that i've mentioned in my previous post.. oh~ she just shifted her bloggy anyway and here's the new link :)

http://www.charleneyl.blogspot.com

i just dunno why but i've start to seek strength from her blog.. it's just.. she's so strong and reali touched my heart so much.. each time i read her blog.. i told myself i have to stay contented with watever god gave me now.. greed shall not overcome me and i shall be blessed.. self consoling? well.. it's better thn letting myself sink to temptation and turn my heart evil.. i've been thinking bout baby's wanting to change his job.. he mentioned that we'll be able to meet at a much more normal timing and i can seriously foresee our days in the near future.. indeed, it'll be something happier for me since we get to see each other more and i dun have to always wait til he end his work at those unhourly timings.. we both wont be as tired as now trying to stay up to reali late just to accompany each other.. but somehow i'm having some doubts bout it =\ this might be a minor change.. but it might affect the entire r/s badly.. i was just having some thots bout changes and how it affects us.. i mean in general so no emo bout it :) it's like.. even if one day my onli wish comes true (it's my secret).. how happy will i be? hmm~ at least for now i noe i have to cherish him and hold him as closely to my heart as possible.. i know how hard it is for us to be tgt and thus i learn to cherish.. but if my onli wish came true.. will i stil noe how to cherish? humans are just cheap creatures that takes thing for granted almost all of our life isnt it? i keep telling myself.. even if one day i were to live a happy life with monetary riches, with r/s riches, with frenship riches, i'll NOT change my character and i will NOT take them for granted.. i keep reminding myself to always think back to these suffering days i'm having and to be thankful IF i were ever be a rich (in everyway) girl one day.. well.. i hope i will not disappoint myself or anyone that loves me now :) just hope for the best and be optimistic in everything i do..

i'm just so in love with you..
stop these greeds and make me content..
loves..

wheee~ everything's been goin alrite for me :) am trying to learn to ignore everything and just walk a step and see a step lol =x anyway.. one big thing is that I'M NOW A PROPERTY AGENT!!! lol~ so if anyone you or ur frens or family needs to rent a space/house/room, or sell or buy houses.. even commercial types can contact me!!! i'm with HSR and here's my pretty photo =x anyway i told mummy that this can be use for my song ka next time lol and i got a knock on my head hehe =x REMEMBER look out for me for property alrite!! love love!!



anyway just to add on.. i've just read fairy darling's bloggy and she planned bout her near future.. i think i should do some planning here too so that i could keep track of my life since i've hit the bloody 21 :( and here it goes..

by the age of..
22 - i MUST graduate with my stupid diploma and do some serious job searching..
24 - i wish to be able to at least be stabalised in my career (as in that'll be my confirmed job)
25 - get my long awaited suzuki swift sports
27 - get engaged (hopefully!!!)
28 - officially married!
30 - get my first kid
.
.
.

the rest i tink i better dun fill in first in case of disappointment.. i dunno how many kids i'd like to have cos i dunno the responsibility level and commitment level yet.. so it's best not to plan that far.. for now definitely i'll wan at least 1 kid and hopefully is a baby boy.. why? cos i wont have to worry THAT much lol =x in this society a girl tends to lose out more thanks to traditional thinkings isnt it? haha~ well the society is changing and hopefully it'll change by thn cos deeply from within, i wan a baby girl lol =x girls are more adorable and i think i can communicate better with them lol..

ok enough talks bout baby and starting my own family.. i'll just wan my family to be perfect or near perfect :) and for now i better cover my ass and make sure i get my diploma.. roar!! sometimes.. i reali hate to be young :( indeed.. adulthood will bring in more stress, responsibility and commitment.. but afterall, as a STABLE adult, it'll be much easier to do things isnt it? for now.. a 21 year old me, i cant make much decision in life for my family.. i cant have much say and i'm very lost about my future :( hopefully my plans will go accordingly and i can follow the timeline i've set for myself :)

god'll help..