Melody of my Life..

@_@
my eye's damn puffy =\ sian la.. dun wan puffy eyes le la.. pls pls pls spare me can?! =( dun wanna wash face with tears anymore.. dun wanna tink bout anything anymore.. =\ dun wanna wake up with super small eyes anymore laaaaaaaaaaa =( hais.. dunno wat the hell i'm feelin rite now.. i feel peaceful but somehow not peaceful =\ why sia?!

who can help me?! =( i tired.. tired of everythin.. tired of school.. tired of hurts.. tired of loves.. tired of classmate's attitude, tired of having to listen to everythin which i dun wanna listen, knowing thing i dun wanna noe.. and i'm tired of life.. =( why is life so tiring?! cant we juz live without any worries? oh man.. i wish i havemore strength to go on.. =
saw munloon, guoquan and shumin today at BK.. but didnt have the courage to say hi.. cos it's been like AGES since we last met.. =\ wonder if they're stil in YMM.. =\ i guess they're stil there ba.. oh ma.. i miss YMM so much =( i miss church.. i miss the happening P&W sessions.. i miss al the after-service chilling madness at church office.. and i miss the LONGGGGG tabled lunch =( wil these come back to me? i need god's presence so much.. i need him! =(

i'm juz too tired.. of everythin.. tired of faking a smile whole day.. tink the onli time i'm truly me is when i'm here blogging.. alone in my room.. listening to songs, staring blankly into my lappie.. and letting wild imaginations run thru my head.. =\ i need god.. i need love.. i need his arms ard me.. and i need someone to be there for me to cry out loud to.. =..(

hais.. life.. sian la.. fri's gonna celebrate willie's bday with him.. ok he's tryin to be damn secretive la.. not telling me where we're goin.. -_- and best is onli me n him.. HELLO! where to?!?! sell me?! lol.. no la.. kiddin.. =) he say it's to cheer me up -_- dunno is cheer me up or make me cannot slp but keep thinkin where r we goin?! lol.. and wonder wat we're gonna do.. he say it's somewhere we can see nite scenes of singapore.. hmm weird.. nvm la sounds romantic lol.. =X imagine he's someone i like ba.. lol =X replace awhile hehe..

i hope he dun read my blog =X walao n his daily grades are like A, A and A -_- how sucky ehh?! maths he got straight As.. kaox! wonder is his faci gd or is he reali tat gd -_- unfair man! nvm he say he'll teach me.. muahaha! he's gonna vomit blood.. =X tml's UT and here i am bloggin stil not slpin OMG la! and i forgot to dl 6p.. =\ lucky tosh reminded me.. phew~ he send me al of them.. haha.. and if i pass i muz treat him drink.. waliewwww! win le lor.. -_- ok la go KO liao.. damn tired n needa listen to some songs and try to sort my mind out..

i dun wish to care too peeps.. but i tink he somehow stands a place in my heart.. i juz cant seem to see him "die" lil thots of him, lil cares for him.. stil fills me no matter wat.. =( i tried not caring.. but i cant.. hais.. why am i always so silly? i hope he dun feel weird.. i hope the weird feelings in him wil soon be gone and life stil goes on for him.. may he grow may he learn..