walao.. how many shocks am i suppose to go thru tonight??

Just spotted something that dun reali make sense..
and a fren suddenly pop me funny question that double shocked me..

Just wanna say 2 things to whoever might be reading..

Firstly.. dun ever ever tink of lying to me..
The last thing i'll ever tolerate is lies..

Secondly.. stop stalkin me n gg ard askin ur frens who am i or wat kind of person am i.. u gt a problem? Come talk to me.. stop behaving like a kid! Ur bf has nth to do w me.. if u're that insecure, buy a chain n lock him up!

Omg.. cant believe i'm dealing w this at this age ._. I thot i can brk free frm all these shits aft i grad frm sec sch..



P/s: no matter hw dear u r to me be it ex, lovers, frens or bro/sis.. i'll still not accept a lie frm u.. i dun deserve to be lied to when i come 101% clean w u in all my stuffs.. dun disappoint me..

been doing alot of shopping today to divert myself..met up with kiera for dinner, collected my heels.. source for fren's bday pressies.. settled qad's xmas pressie.. and best loot of the day, my beloved ring :)

kiera said i'm crazy the moment i decided to buy it.. but well.. i reali should pamper myself a little more aint i? after all the shits that happened to me this lousy 2012 / 2013.. i tink i deserve something to reward myself for being a survival.. lol. afterall been eyeing on one for 3yrs alr.. thou not my ideal one.. but still something :)

in 24hr's time.. he'll be back..
should i anticipate his return?
or should i not?

tonnes of misses is crushing on me :( but i dun wanna face the bad news.. sigh..
how i wish.....



i wish upon my lucky star..

My thoughts..

Kinda love this much :)

Perhaps..

Couldnt slp n went thru our msges.. i smiled and thn i cried :(

thinking that perhaps he's alr someone else's now..
Perhaps i no longer is being missed by him now..
Perhaps i'm no longer his baby girl now..
I'm here hugging my teddy wishing it was him..
But perhaps he's hugging her now..
Why am i rubbing salt into my wound?
perhaps a good way to stop feeling the pain is to numb the wound..
And to numb the wound, is to maximise the pain..

I know he's trying his best to minimise my pains..
I know he is trying his best to maximise my happiness before he left..
And i'm truly thankful..
I know i promised not to get emo while he's away..
But i reali cant control my emotions n tears :(

I need a good hug n a good cry :(

my misses for u is killing me :(



p/s: will u miss me if one day i'm gone?

Day 2..

Tried really hard not to tink of anything.. spent my day clearing work's reports and started on my accounting assignment part 1. surprisingly i can construct my own cash budget! ^^ but when it comes to the essay.. i stared blank ._. gave up on the essay part for today and started on my ITM essay.. not bad.. kinda completed more thn 50% of it and am stil at it now.. just kinda need a break from those typings, brainstormings and bullshitting =\..

couldn't hold back anymore..

BABY I MISS U! 

 :(

keep tinking did this silly boy take his meal properly.. did this silly boy gets dragged to do stuffs he doesnt reali wan to.. did this silly boy have enough rest.. is this silly boy stil coughing early in the morning.. wondering how is he now :(

3 more days to go.. how am i gonna endure? :(

 P/s : how i wish i can turn the hands of the clock so that it's monday tomorrow :(

I will nv walk away until..

A beautiful quote from my fren Tata :)

 

Love is when you allow yourself to put aside everything you hear, and everything you see, all the rumors that discourage you mean nothing to you because you know you can put your full trust into that person.

You follow your heart and let no one else control your decisions, you put your heart on the line and open yourself up to that person. You’re willing to give them your all, you make time for them like no other, make them your first priority and nothing less. You do stupid stuff, screw up and try to fix everything, screw it up and try to fix it again to make it all better.

You never give up, endure all the pain and all the mess that your relationship may bring you, but you never leave even though you know at any second they can just walk out of your life in just one snap of your fingers.

Love is beautiful, love can hurt you, love can be a real pain in your life. But when you truly love someone that much, you risk everything ♥ 

 

P/S : til the day u found someone who can truly cherish u.. who can truly take gd care of u.. who can give u the love u truly deserves.. i will never walk away..

Day 1..

Feeling kinda sucky :( kept holding onto my phone in case i missed his calls or text.. but of cos.. it nv happened.. should have expected but just in case.. tried to bury myself in dramas to avoid tinking too much.. ended up the stupid drama is talking about r/s issues arghhhhhhh :( straight away stop it and did something else.. did a reali nice drawing ^^ it's been so long since i last drew.. felt kinda good.. abit disfigured =\ but well.. still-life drawing is al along not my forte watttttt.. can get this standard very gd alr la *self console* i'm actually quite amazed that i actually did something like that.. lol

drew for 3hrs.. now that i'm done.. back to square one again :( took out my bible, made a little prayer that God wil show me some comforting verses.. randomly flip, and came across this message in the book of Jeremiah talking about awaiting for a lost one to return.. hmmmm..... aft reading it, my brain totally hay wired x.x this sentence can be applied to ALOT of things i'm facing now.. i tink i'll need more time to fully understand wat God is trying to say..

had a little chat with qad and kinda throw my heart at her hehe.. she mentioned "u fall until ur brain spoile liao huh? why are u sending him away? if u like him just go for it la!" =\ aft reading wat she said, i was wondering.. why the hell am i backing off? aft a long ding dong with qad, i said if he's single, perhaps i'll go all out.. afterall fighting for my own happiness is wat i always believed in.. well well.. am not gonna get all emo nemo here since i promised not to.. just feeling kinda empty.. =\ guess i'll watch some tv to kill time..

came across a nice song randomly and am loving the lyrics.. just gonna post it here :)

总要在说完再见以后 才开始明白爱多浓..
今晚你想念的人是不是我?

P/s : I miss u so much.... loves.. :(